“If you want better answers, ask better questions”.
My last blog I talked about living in the solution and not the problems. I sustained my brain injury in 2013, I had an identity crisis. I often tell myself and tell people that before my brain injury I was trying to take God where I wanted to go in my life. I knew God and I had faith, but I didn’t understand how to serve God and be an ambassador of Christ.
I was just misguided in my identity and that is how the enemy works in his deception. I emphatically say that my worst has become my best day. I am filled with purpose and my identity in Christ who strengthens me Philippians 4:13 NIV say I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
I ran my first half marathon 8 weeks after my brain injury. That is not what personally stands out to me the most in my journey. I signed up for the 2013 Pittsburgh half Marathon in the summer of 2012. The 2012 Summer Olympics inspired me to do something out of my comfort zone. Up until that point my life identity was in basketball ever since I was a kid.
In hindsight I was already struggling with who I was because my identity in basketball was slowly fading in 2012.
I loved coaching basketball, and I loved teaching the younger generation all the life lessons I had learned through basketball. Then in 2013 I sustained my brain injury. My balance system was extremely affected was my identity. It took years to find my identity in Christ. How could I coach kids the game that I could no longer play? When we in something other than Xhrist then imposer syndrome moves in fast. That was the first time I truly felt defeated in my life.
When I was told I couldn’t run the half marathon that was 8 weeks out that was when God turned my life around. Everyone was telling me I couldn’t and shouldn’t run that race. My doctors, my friends and my family, do I blame them? No! However, it sure did leave me feeling defeated, broken and isolated.
Signing up for that race in 2012 is just one of the ways I now see now what God was planning. Because everyone was telling me I couldn’t run the race I asked myself many questions. Do I race? Do I sell my race bib? Do I just give someone my race bib? When I was told that I could sell my bib to get my money back I knew I had to run the race. I was not going to sell my right to run that race.
Suddenly the obstacles that brain injury presented didn’t seem to matter because running that race was a goal set in stone.
The half marathon was on Sunday May 5th, 2013. I had to go pick up my race packet on race weekend. I drove downtown and I parked what would be about a mile away from the David Lawrence Convention Center. I started walking and I got lost. I don’t know how else to explain it. I simply couldn’t find the David Lawrence Convention Center.
This is where I really lost my identity. How could this happen? I was an adult that was lost in an area he had lived since Elementary school. After being lost 4 hours I finally asked a gentleman at a crosswalk if he was going to get his race packet. I had 4 hours to ask someone for help and my ego and emotions were so high. He said that he was going to the race expo and so I followed him there.
That Sunday when I crossed the finished line I never felt more or an accomplishment in my life. The entire race I just stayed to the right side of the course and literally keep my eyes focused on someone’s hips just ahead of me. Crossing the finish line was the best feeling, but Who was I?
I was just lost 4 hours a few days ago, and then on the other hand I just crossed the finish line of a half marathon 8 weeks after a brain injury. Who am I? I am so passionate when I talk to people about what happens when chaos leads our lives. I can tell you that weekend was the weekend that chaos led my life for some time.
It took time for God to train me to lead with curiosity find clarity to attain power, love and self-control.
Fast Forward years later into my journey and my book Let faith Grow Running Through Adversity was almost published in 2023. I was eagerly awaiting author copies from my publishing team at Streamline Books. A few weeks prior to my book release I was on an online meeting with a mentor of mine. We were doing a fellowship/leadership call.
There were only several of us on that video call. Adam asked the most important question I have ever been asked. “Who is God calling you?” Adam said. Before others gave their answers out loud, Adam explained how God had changed Abram’s name to Abrham. I encourage you to look it over in Genesis 17:5 God already knew Abraham as Abrham who would be the father of many nations before this world.
When God told Abram his name was now Abraham this world still recognized him as Abram. God knew his name before this world did. So, this question was who was God calling me to be? What’s my name? Yes, my name is Ben (actually Benjamin is my full name) But who is God calling me to be? “Without thinking to long about this question, I knew my answer. I want you to say out loud who God has called you to be” Adam said. Without hesitation and thinking I said, “I am called to be the voice of the voiceless”.
I went on to talk about how I wanted to encourage others who didn’t feel like they had a voice.
A few weeks later I got a package in the mail. The package was from Streamline Books congratulating me on being an author. Inside the package was a bracelet that had Proverbs 31:8-9. I thought it was awesome, they sent me a bracelet with a verse. Then I went and looked that verse up. Proverbs 31:8-9 NIV says “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly: defend the rights of the poor and needy.” When I saw that verse and I remembered my answer on that video a few weeks prior that became one of the best lessons I have learned.
If you want better answers, then ask better questions. Here are 5 questions I have asked myself and have helped me grow in my identity in Christ. I encourage you to write down these questions then and do not be afraid to answer them out loud.
- Who has God called me to be?
- Do I live with my identity in Christ?
- Do I put my identity and worth in this world?
- Am I using my time, talents and resources to serve others?
- Am I afraid of failure, regrets, why?
I would love to hear your feedback on this or any topic you find encouraging. Thank you, and remember to be encouraged every day. Someone was inspired by the way you showed up this week. If you want to learn more about my book, Let Faith Grow: Running Through Adversity, grab a copy via Amazon or visit my website, https://www.letfaithgrow-benhintonspeaking.com/ today.
